Highs and Lows

Throughout my life, I have either been depressed or feeling good about myself, and never know when I am going to experience what behavior and for how long...  PISSER...

As I understand it, my daughter was diagnosed by a physician with being bi-polar and was put on medication.  The physician told her that she probably got it from me and that I probably got it from my mother...  although, there was no evidence of that because neither my mother or I went to a physician to have that theory checked out, even though we both displayed symptoms of being bi-polar.

My bi-polar condition really manifested itself in 1966 when I attended college as it turned on the depression side rather than the high side which was really needed.  As a result, I flunked out of college two and a half years later, still living inside my depression.

My highs caused me accomplish numerous things during my working career which looked good on a resume and got me promoted or into new jobs, but the lows caused me to lose my job 10 times also because of my actions.

OR...  is this just an excuse???

Who knows???

In retirement, it does not bother me as much but I can also see the difference in my behavior.  Recently, I was on a HIGH and wrote two and a half 300 page novels, then my LOW kicked in and right in the middle of my third novel...  I just stopped writing...

I did absolutely nothing for about a month except take showers and empty the cat litter and eat meals...  however, I did do a lot of sleeping about 10-15 hours each day...

It's not like anything you have ever experienced.